"Would you rather spend a quiet evening by yourself, reading an awful book with a contrived plot and cringy dialogue . . . or read 'hey,' 'sup,' 'hiii,' and 'how u doin,' written by a man you matched with three months ago on a different app who apparently has no recollection of going out with you?"
"Would you rather go for a solo walk and get attacked by hissing Canada geese in heat . . . or go for a walk with a man who regales you with endless examples of how great online dating is going for him?"
"Would you rather go to a dog park on your own, receive weird looks from dog owners because you have no dog, and get your leg humped by three muddy puppies who smell like pee . . . or find out that your Bumble date lied on his profile about his age, his lack of kids (they very much exist), and the cocker spaniel he clearly borrowed to attract women who love dogs?"
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